...changed as much as I did between my 21st and 22nd year and my 14th and 15th year. Those were the two other largest periods of change in my life and this one was just as big albeit not nearly as noticeable. From fourteen to fifteen I changed from quiet and reserved to loud and rowdy. I was not longer afraid of being accepted, I was angry about not being accepted as I wanted to be. From twenty-one to twenty-two I went from a mess of a college graduate to on the road to health and happiness thanks to Rolf, yoga, a few other folks, and myself.
This past year though I changed in myriad ways but there is one that really sticks out in my mind. Prior to this year I tended to talk a big game about how you should dedicate yourself to something because God knows it is easier to tell someone else to do something than do it yourself. To quote the Bard, 'All can master a grief except he that has it.' This year I actually put that into practice. I can be even more specific though. I didn't really being to put all of myself into my work until about February. Sure, I did nice things prior to that and I was invested in the success of my students. There was a point though where they were no longer just 'my students', they were the students I was fortunate enough to have an opportunity to work with. And then it wasn't about getting to 'work' with them, it was being able to help them down a path of their own choosing.
When I finally realized how much all of this meant to me I finally realized what it means to give wholly of yourself. Now I must work on what I expect in return. I expect more than is reasonable sometimes and I know that hurt feelings and caused problems that would have otherwise not been there. Wow though, I have changed a lot this past year.
